The goodWindows 10 bridges the gap between PCs and tablets without alienating anyone. The new OS combines the best bits of old and new Windows features into a cohesive package, while correcting nearly all of the missteps of Windows 8. The upgrade process is mostly painless, and free for most Windows 7 and 8 users. The badMany of the new features will be lost on those who don't care about touch. Automatic, forced updates could spell trouble later on. Cortana's features are better suited for smartphones. The bottom lineWindows 10 delivers a refined, vastly improved vision for the future of computing with an operating system that's equally at home on tablets and traditional PCs -- and it's a free upgrade for most users. CNET review Windows 10 is the Goldilocks version of Microsoft's venerable PC operating system -- a "just right" compromise between the familiar dependability of Windows 7, and the forward-looking touchscreen vision of Windows 8. This new Wind...
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Showing posts from 2015
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Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?" Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women that I have wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them." His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother." A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?" With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much." The friend said, "Then what's the problem?" Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."
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A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine. Officer: You were speeding. Man: No, I wasn't. Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket. Man: But I wasn't speeding. Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.) Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk? Officer: Yes, you would. Man: What if I just thought that you were? Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think. Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!
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A young man comes before a customs agent. A: "State your citizenship." B:"American" (pronounced with a Spanish accent). A: "Hold on there, buddy. Say that again." B: "I sed American." A: "I'm going to give you a test." B: "No, no senor, no need for test, I tell you I"m American." A: "Yeah, sure buddy. OK, let's see, ... I've got it. Make a sentence with the following colors: green, pink and yellow." B: "Oh senor, I tell you I'm American. But OK, let's see... I was at my bruder-in-laws house and the phone went 'green, green, I pinked it up and sed yellow!"
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[Friday] Bajrangi Bhaijaan 1st Day Collection | BB First Opening Day Bajrangi Bhaijaan Worldwide Box Office Collection Shantanu July 18, 2015 Bahubali Box Office Collection Total Worldwide Earning Report, Bajrangi Bhaijaan Business Report, Bajrangi Bhaijaan News, Bajrangi Bhaijaan Opening Day Collection, Bajrangi Bhaijaan Till Now Collection Comments [Friday] Bajrangi Bhaijaan 1st Day Collection | BB First Opening Day Worldwide Box Office Collection– Kabir Khan directed and big boss Salman Khan produced ‘Bajrangi Bhaijaan’ is releasing today and more than thousands of screens will display the movie. This was the most awaited movie of Salman Khan this year which is releasing on 17th July. The first day income reports predict that the film will cross at least 30 Crores on its opening day. It is also said that it can break the record of Baahubali, the south film, which collected more than 50 Crores on previous Friday. And now, this Friday, ‘Bajrangi Bhaijaan’ may repe...
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एक - मारवाड़ी अपनी बकरी को बस में ले जाने लगा कंडेक्टर ने मना कर दिया.. तब मारवाड़ी बकरी को बुरका पहना के बस में ले गया... Conducter को बोला -'ये मेरी नानी हे, बुढापे की वजह से कमर झुक गई हे.. कुछ देर बाद बकरी ने potty कर दी. पास में बैठे पंजाबी ने बोला ' 😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛😛 0ye . तेरी नानी की रुद्राक्ष की माला टूट गई
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A: I'm in a big trouble! B: Why is that? A: I saw a mouse in my house! B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap. A: I don't have one. B: Well then, buy one. A: Can't afford one. B: I can give you mine if you want. A: That sounds good. B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap. A: I don't have any cheese. B: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap. A: I don't have oil. B: Well, then put only a small piece of bread. A: I don't have bread. B: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!
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Really nice Bol ke padhna, sukun milega... जो चाहा कभी पाया नहीं, जो पाया कभी सोचा नहीं, जो सोचा कभी मिला नहीं, जो मिला रास आया नहीं, जो खोया वो याद आता है पर जो पाया संभाला जाता नहीं , क्यों अजीब सी पहेली है ज़िन्दगी जिसको कोई सुलझा पाता नहीं... जीवन में कभी समझौता करना पड़े तो कोई बड़ी बात नहीं है, क्योंकि, झुकता वही है जिसमें जान होती है, अकड़ तो मुरदे की पहचान होती है। ज़िन्दगी जीने के दो तरीके होते है! पहला: जो पसंद है उसे हासिल करना सीख लो.! दूसरा: जो हासिल है उसे पसंद करना सीख लो.! जिंदगी जीना आसान नहीं होता; बिना संघर्ष कोई महान नहीं होता.! जिंदगी बहुत कुछ सिखाती है; कभी हंसती है तो कभी रुलाती है; पर जो हर हाल में खुश रहते हैं; जिंदगी उनके आगे सर झुकाती है। चेहरे की हंसी से हर गम चुराओ; बहुत कुछ बोलो पर कुछ ना छुपाओ; खुद ना रूठो कभी पर सबको मनाओ; राज़ है ये जिंदगी का बस जीते चले जाओ। "गुजरी हुई जिंदगी को कभी याद न कर, तकदीर मे जो लिखा है उसकी फर्याद न कर... जो होगा वो होकर रहेगा, तु कल की फिकर मे अपनी आज की हसी...
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This is a riddle. It works well if you let the students ask yes and no questions about the situation, before revealing the answer. Q: A man goes into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The barman pulls out a gun, and points it at the customer. "Thank you" replies the customer and walks out. What happened? A: The customer had hiccups. I've used this in many countries in Eastern Europe. It always works - a shock as a hiccup cure appears to be an international thing.
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Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?" Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them." His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother." A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?" With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much." The friend said, "Then what's the problem?" Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."
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A: I'm in a big trouble! B: Why is that? A: I saw a mouse in my house! B: Oh, well, all you need to do is use a trap. A: I don't have one. B: Well then, buy one. A: Can't afford one. B: I can give you mine if you want. A: That sounds good. B: All you need to do is just use some cheese in order to make the mouse come to the trap. A: I don't have any cheese. B: Okay then, take a piece of bread and put a bit of oil in it and put it in the trap. A: I don't have oil. B: Well, then put only a small piece of bread. A: I don't have bread. B: Then what is the mouse doing at your house?!
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A Very Very TRIPLE meaning Example of . ” HAR1 FRIEND KAMINA HOTA HAI” . Ladka dost se :Yaar maine apni Girl Friend ko uski birthday peapni behan ki new diamond ring chori ker k giftde di . Dost (Thappad maar kar) : kaminey Itnimehngi kharidi thi maine . Ladka: saale martakyun hai tere ghar hi to wapis gayi hai
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Girl - yaar mujhe aapse kuch kehna hai . Boy - haan bolo Girl - yr aap mujhe bhul jao.. . Boy- what??? pagal ho gae ho tum?? yeh kya bol rahi ho,? mei tumhare bina kaise rahunga yeh socha bhi hai tumne?? yaar i can't live without u ...plz yr aisa mt bolo . Girl - sorry yr par aab tum bhul jao mujhe or ab message mat karna please bye.. . . AT Mid Night . . . . Girl - soo gaye kya?? Boy - nhi abhi nhi .. . Girl - soo jao raat bahut ho gae hai.. Boy - ok..bye.. . Girl - bye . . .after few minute . Girl - abhi bhi nhi soye Boy - nhi pr tum bhi to nhi soyi abhi tak . Girl - haa mujhe nind nhi aa rahi isliye Boy - kyu...! . Girl - (gusse me) tumne gud night jo nhi bola abhi tak .. itni der se soch rahi hu ki aab bologe pr tum ho ki bolte hi nhi ... . Boy - ok baba, sorry gud night aab soo jao . Girl- ok gud night . . again after few minutes . . . Girl - abhi bhi nind nhi aa rahi jaise roj bolte ho waise bolo na gud night ..,tab sayad nind aa jae . Boy - ok babu ..gud night i love you so...
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A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine. Officer: You were speeding. Man: No, I wasn't. Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket. Man: But I wasn't speeding. Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.) Man: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk? Officer: Yes, you would. Man: What if I just thought that you were? Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think. Man: Fine, I think you're a jerk!
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A Scotsman who was driving home one night, ran into a car driven by an Englishman. The Scotsman got out of the car to apologize and offered the Englishman a drink from a bottle of whisky. The Englishman was glad to have a drink. "Go on," said the Scot, "have another drink." The Englishman drank gratefully. "But don't you want one, too?" he asked the Scotsman. "Perhaps," replied the Scotsman, "after the police have gone."
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Station Master and a Lady Passenger A lady was running to catch a train to Bangalore. She reached the station and was searching for the train. Passenger: (Asked to the station master) Sir, is this my train? Station Master: No Madam, this is not your train, it’s railways department’s train. Passenger: (Annoyed) That’s a good joke. Don’t act too smart. What I meant was, can I take this train to Bangalore? Station Master: No ma’am, you cannot! This train is so BIG and you can’t take it. Passenger: Its really funny! Now say me, will this train take me to Bangalore? Station Master: NO ma’am. The train can’t take you. The train driver will drive it to Bangalore! The passenger fainted!
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एक ✈ हवाई जहाज 💭 आसमान की ऊंचाइयों में उड रहा था कि अचानक अपना 🚟 संतुलन खोकर इधर उधर 🚡 लहराने लगा सभी 👪 यात्री 👬👭 अपनी मृत्यु को समीप जान डर के मारे चीखने चिल्लाने लगे सिवाय एक 🙇 बच्ची के जो मुस्कुराते हुए चुपचाप 🎭 खिलोने से खेल रही थी कुछ देर बाद 🚀 हवाई जहाज सकुशल, सुरक्षित उतरा और 👪 यात्रियों 👭👬 ने राहत की साँस ली एक 👴 यात्री ने उत्सुकतावश उस 🙇 बच्ची से पूछा- 🙇 बेटा हम सभी डर के मारे काँप रहे थे पर तुमको डर नहीं लग रहा था ऐसा क्यों ? 🙇 बच्ची ने जवाब दिया- "क्योंकि इस 🚁 प्लेन के पायलट मेरे 👨 पापा हैं 🙇 मैं जानती थी कि 👨 वो मुझे कुछ नहीं होने देंगे 👉 मित्रो, ठीक इसी तरह का विश्वास हमे एडमिन पर होना चाहिये 👈 👋 परिस्थितियाँ चाहे कितनी ही विपरीत हो जाऐं ☝पर एक ना एक दिन👆 👏 एडमिन पार्टी जरूर देगा 👏 🍵🍹🍝🍦🍰🍉🍺🍧🍇 🍎🍣🍫🍷🍊🍲🍉🍸 हमारे ग्रूप एडमिन की कहानी मस्ती भरी जुबानी। हमारे एडमिन के पास पावर है चलता नहीं अलग बात है। 😜😜😜😜 . हमारा एडमिन स्मार्ट है कोई मानता नहीं अलग बात है। 😚😚😚😚 . हमारा एडमिन शरीफ है लगता नहीं अलग बात है।...
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Missing Baggage Rosy just get off the flight and reached the baggage area to collect her luggage. She was a month’s tour to Europe and just returned home. She was very tensed as she could not find her luggage, where she had all the things shopped in the Europe. The tensed Rosy approached the baggage in-charge and informed that she arrived from France and she could not find her baggage in the carousel. The in-charge smiled and ask Rosy to stay calm. She informed Rosy that they were professionals with expert training and they would find her luggage and hand over it to her. Rosy was relaxed. The officer in-charge asked her about the color, number of bags, brand etc. Rosy replied. Finally, the officer in-charge asked her ‘Has your flight arrived?’ Rosy Fainted.
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Missing Baggage Rosy just get off the flight and reached the baggage area to collect her luggage. She was a month’s tour to Europe and just returned home. She was very tensed as she could not find her luggage, where she had all the things shopped in the Europe. The tensed Rosy approached the baggage in-charge and informed that she arrived from France and she could not find her baggage in the carousel. The in-charge smiled and ask Rosy to stay calm. She informed Rosy that they were professionals with expert training and they would find her luggage and hand over it to her. Rosy was relaxed. The officer in-charge asked her about the color, number of bags, brand etc. Rosy replied. Finally, the officer in-charge asked her ‘Has your flight arrived?’ Rosy Fainted.
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Grey Hair Mona has a beautiful and naughty daughter called Sona. She is very naughty and mischievous. One day, the little Sona with great curiosity asked her mom, ‘Mamma why your hair is turning grey? I don’t like it.’ Mona decided to teach her child about good behaviour and replied, ‘Dear, my hair is turning grey only because of you. Whenever you do any bad action, one of my hairs will turn grey.’ Sona was thinking for a while in silent and laughed loudly. Mom asked, what happened? Sona replied, ‘Momma now I understand why grandma’s hair is completely grey!’
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एक लड़की ने अपने बॉयफ्रेंड से कहा, "तुम मेरे लिए क्या कर सकते हो?" लड़का: जो तुम कहो डार्लिंग। लड़की: क्या तुम मेरे लिए चाँद ला सकते हो? लड़का गया और थोड़ी देर बाद हाथ में कुछ चीज़ छिपा कर लाया और लड़की से कहा, "आँखे बंद करो।" लड़की ने आँखें बंद की तो लड़के ने वो चीज़ लड़की के हाथो में दी और लड़की से आँखे खोलने को कहा। लड़की ने आखें खोली तो उस चीज़ को देख उसकी आँखों में आंसू थे। क्योकि उसके हाथों में एक आइना था जिसमे उस लड़की का चेहरा नज़र आ रहा था। लड़की: तुम मुझे चाँद सा समझते हो? लड़का: नहीं, मैं तो तुम्हें सिर्फ ये समझा रहा था कि जिस मुँह से चाँद मांग रही हैं कभी वो थोबड़ा आईने में भी देखा है या नहीं?
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Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked, "Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?" Fred replied, "Actually, I've found many women that I have wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn't like them." His friend thinks for a moment and says, "I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who's just like your mother." A few months later they meet again and his friend says, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?" With a frown on his face, Fred answers, "Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much." The friend said, "Then what's the problem?" Fred replied, "My father doesn't like her."
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Teacher asked the students to tell the importance of the year 1809. John stand up and said “Abraham Lincoln was born” Then teacher again asked the students to tell the importance of another year 1819 Then Sam suddenly stand up and said “Abraham Lincoln was ten years old”! - See more at: http://www.kidsworldfun.com/jokes/classroom-jokes.php#sthash.DGxsPqCT.dpuf Teacher asked the students to tell the importance of the year 1809. John stand up and said “Abraham Lincoln was born” Then teacher again asked the students to tell the importance of another year 1819 Then Sam suddenly stand up and said “Abraham Lincoln was ten years old”! - See more at: http://www.kidsworldfun.com/jokes/classroom-jokes.php#sthash.DGxsPqCT.dpuf Teacher asked the students to tell the importance of the year 1809. John stand up and said “Abraham Lincoln was born” ...
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पाठक जी कहिन... सांप लोट जाता है सीने पर जब शादी के कई साल बाद भी ससुराल वाले कहते हैं, ‘हमारी बेटी तो गाय है!’ विश्वास का तो जमाना ही नहीं रहा। फेसबुक पर लड़कियों की फेक आईडी को हम सच समझकर उनसे चैट करते रहे और सारी ‘असली’ लड़कियां पढ़-पढ़ कर यूपीएसी क्वालिफाई कर गईं! हाईटेक प्रार्थना - काश कभी ऐसा हो जाए... मैं वॉट्सएप करूं खुदा को और उसमें ब्लू टिक हो जाए! फोकट का ज्ञान - मंजन करने के बाद दांतों पर अंगुली रगड़े। अगर किचु-किचु की आवाज आए तो समझ लेना कि दांत साफ हो गए हैं। प्यार तो उसी दिन हो गया था, जब वह पंगत में जीमते टेम बोली थी कि आप लाए हो तो आधी पुड़ी और ले लूंगी!
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Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?" One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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फेसबुक की लड़कियां चिप्स के पैकेट की तरह होती हैं लड़कों को पता भी है की मिलना कुछ नही है सिर्फ हवाबाजी है फिर भी... ज्यादा भाव देते है - See more at: http://www.jagran.com/jokes/general/jokes-12554525.html?src=ART-JOK#sthash.yB4RK7ka.dpuf फेसबुक की लड़कियां चिप्स के पैकेट की तरह होती हैं लड़कों को पता भी है की मिलना कुछ नही है सिर्फ हवाबाजी है फिर भी... ज्यादा भाव देते है - See more at: http://www.jagran.com/jokes/general/jokes-12554525.html?src=ART-JOK#sthash.yB4RK7ka.dpuf
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Q: What do you say when you are comforting a grammar nazi? A: There, Their, They're Q: What's another name for Santa's elves? A: Subordinate Clauses. Q: How does an English teacher punish a valley girl? A: Assign a 10-15 page research paper on the bastardization of the word "like" Q: What is Grammar? A: The difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit. Q: How do you spell mousetrap? A: C-A-T. Q: What is Black and white and read (red) all over? A: A newspaper Q: "What letter of the alphabet has got lots of water?" A: "The C" Q: "What letter of the alphabet is always waiting in order?" A: "The Q. (queue) Q: What begins with T, ends with T and has T in it? A: A teapot. Q: A word in this sentence is misspelled. What word is it? A: Misspelled? Q: Which letters do Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday have in common? A: None! None of them have "c", "o","m" or "n"...
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It was oral examination in the standard two. The class teacher asked various questions to the students. She asked Tom, ‘Can you tell me a name of an animal that starts with alphabet ‘E’? Tom replied ‘ELEPHANT’ Teacher asked him again to name an animal that starts with alphabet ‘T’. Tom replied ‘Two Elephants’ Teacher asked him the same question. Tom replied ‘Ten Elephants’ Annoyed teacher, asked him name an animal that starts with alphabet ‘M’ Tom replied ‘Mother Elephant’ The angry teacher repeated the same question. Cool Tom replied ‘May be an elephant’
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A teacher is talking to a student. Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework? Student: No, he did it all by himself. On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed. "What's the matter? Are you sick?" "No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see an old lady standing."
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रोंगटे खड़े करने वाली खबर एक सच्ची घटना जिसे सुनकर इंसान की रूह काँप जाये ,, लेकिन जालिमों के हाथ तक नहीं काँपे ,, इंदौर की एक 17 साल की लड़की, जिसने अभी अभी 12 पास किया था, . . और . . अभी जो उसके enjoy करने के दिन थे ,,, उसके सगे मामा ने बहला फुसला कर ,, . . उसका ,, . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . enginnering का फॉर्म भरवा दिया😀😀
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AVG PC TuneUp 2015 (build 604) Quickly and easily boost the performance of your computer with this very comprehensive maintenance tool By Mike Williams | 01 Jul 15 Email AVG PC TuneUp 2015 is an extremely powerful system maintenance and optimisation tool which will help you clean your system, fix problems, improve stability, extend battery life, free up hard drive space, and generally keep your PC running at peak performance. If you think that sounds thorough, then you're right, and that impression will be confirmed as you start to explore. The program's Optimize section, for instance, has modules to defragment your hard drive, disable unnecessary startup programs, uninstall applications you don't need, optimize your system startup and shutdown, and clean and defragment the Registry. And that's before you get on to the more advanced "Optimize" features. Like a "Disable Programs" module which allows you to temporarily turn off applications, fre...
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Some scientists decided to do the following experiments on a dog. For the first experiment, they cut one of the dog's legs off, then they told the dog to walk. The dog got up and walked, so they they learned that a dog could walk with just three legs. For the second experiment, they cut off a second leg from the dog, then they told the dog once more to walk. The dog was still able to walk with only two legs. For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the dog and once more they told the dog to walk. However, the dog wasn't able to walk with only one leg. As a result of these three experiments, the scientists wrote in their final report that the dog had lost it's hearing after having three legs cut off.
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3,347 This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95. Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision. Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course. Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES' ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED By THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFE...
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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts." The doctor asks, "What do you mean?" The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts." The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you - you've broken your finger!"
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😜😜😂😭😆😊😜 मुर्गियों के फार्म में एक बार निरीक्षण के लिए इंस्पेक्टर आया,, इंस्पेक्टर :- तुम मुर्गियों को क्या खिलाते हो...? पहला :- बाजरा इंस्पेक्टर-: खराब खाना, इसे गिरफ्तार कर लो,, दूसरा :- चावल इंस्पेक्टर: गलत खाना इसे भी गिरफ्तार कर लो,, अब संता की बार आई, वह बहुत डर गया था। इंस्पेक्टर संता से, "तुम मुर्गियों को क्या खिलाते हो" संता डरते-डरते बोला :- "साहब हम तो मुर्गियों को 5-5 रुपए दे देते हैं, जो तुम्हारी मर्जी है जाकर खा लो" 😜😜😜😜😜😜😜😜
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इस संसार में हकीकत में कौन क्या है.......? • केले का छिलका----- पृथ्वी से मिलाप करने का दलाल • सिनेमा----- पैसा देकर कैद होने का स्थान • जेल ----- बिना पैसे का हास्टल • सास ----- बहु के पीछे छोडा गया बिना पैसे का जासूस • चिन्ता----- बजन कम करने की सबसे सस्ती दवा • मृत्यु ----- बिना पासपोर्ट के पृथ्वी सेदूर जाने की छूट • ताला ----- बिना वेतन का चौकीदार • मुर्गा ----- देहात की अलार्म घडी • झगडा ----- वकील का कमाऊ बेटा • चश्मा----- जादूई आँख • स्वप्न ----- बिना पैसे की फिल्म • हॉस्पिटल----- रोगियों का संग्रहालय • श्मशान----- दुनिया का आखिरी स्टेशन • ईश्वर----- किसी से मुलाकात न करने वाला व्यवस्थापक • चाय कॉफी----- कलयुग का अमृत • विद्वान----- अक्ल का ठेकेदार • चोर----- रात का शरीफ व्यापारी • विश्व----- एक महान धर्मशाला। गलती जिंदगी का एक पन्ना है; परन्तु 'रिश्ते' पूरी किताब हैं। ज़रूरत पड़ने पर 'गलती' का पन्ना फाड़ देना लेकिन एक पन्ने के लिए पूरी किताब मत फाड़ देना।
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अमेरिकन कंपनी में इंटरव्यू: मैनेजर : What's ur name? लड़का : Ranveer Pratap Singh मैनेजर : Any work experience or fresher? लड़का : Sir, I hav 2 years work experience. मैनेजर : Where r u from? लड़का : Sir, India मैनेजर : अरे वाह ! इंडिया में कहां से? लड़का : सर, उत्तर प्रदेश से मैनेजर : कहां के हो, उत्तर प्रदेश में? लड़का : ग़ाज़ीपुर से मैनेजर : का बात है! कउने जगह से आयल हउवा बेटा? लड़का : चाचा, देवकली मैनेजर : ई कउने ओर परत है बछवा? लडका : सैदपुर देखत हुआ चाचा? मैनेजर : हा हा लडका : बस ओकरे बगलिये में हौ! मैनेजर : अच्छा-अच्छा! चल बछवा तोहार नौकरी पक्की, बिहान से आई जाओ ड्यूटी पे! लड़का : चाचा हमार बायोडेटा त देख लै! मैनेजर : ससुर नकल कइके पास हौवा, बायोडाटा का देखइबा...चल सुरती बनाव। :P :D :P
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~रहता हूं किराये के घर में... रोज़ सांसों को बेच कर किराया चूकाता हूं.... ~मेरी औकात है बस मिट्टी जितनी... बात मैं महल मिनारों की कर जाता हूं.... ~जल जायेगा ये मेरा घर इक दिन... फिर भी इसकी खूबसूरती पर इतराता हूं.... ~खुद के सहारे मैं श्मशान तक भी ना जा सकूंगा... फिर ज़माने को क्यों दुश्मन बनाता हूं...
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लड़का बाइक चला रहा था . . . एक लड़की ने scooty से उसे ओवरटेक किया. . . लड़का चिल्लाया ,” ए भैस “ . . लड़की ने पीछे मुड़कर देखा और चिल्लाई … गधा , कुत्ता , बन्दर , उल्लू का पट्ठा . . अचानक लड़की का accident हो गया रोड पार करते हुए वो एक भैस से टकरा गई .. . मोरल -:लड़की ये कभी नहीं समझती की लड़का आखिर कहना क्या चाहता है।
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एक लड़की का फोन TOILET मे गिर गया. . . . . . . TOILET से ''TOILET देवी '' प्रकट हुई. . . . . . ''TOILET देवी'' ने लड़की को गोल्ड का फोन दिया और कहा ये लो तुम्हारा फोन. . . . . . . लड़की ने ''कुल्हाडी'' वाली कहानी सुन रखी थी . . . . . . . . इसलिए ईमानदारी का परिचय देते हुए कहा ये सोने का फोन मेरा नहीं है. . . . . . . ''TOILET देवी'' :- धो के देख पगली तेरा ही है. . . . . 😜
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📲 Mobile Aya 📷 Camera Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya ⏰ Wrist Watch Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 🔦 Torch Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 📻 Radio Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 🔊 MP3 Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 📝 Letters Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 📟 Calculator Khatam 📲Mobile Aya 💻 Computer Khatam 📲 Mobile Aya 🙇 Sakoon Khatam Aur agar apka “Mobile" 📲 ap ki Biwi ke haath aya toh - Maa Kasam - aap "Khatam." 🔫🙅 .....🎩 @ 👀👂 ( 👃 ) \ 👅 / ✋🎽c👍 👖 / \ 👞👞 Ek dum latest ...😜j Badalti Duniya Ka aisa Asar Hone Laga, Aadmi pagal😔Aur Phone Smart Hone Laga ! 😀